The word ‘Bridezilla’ needs to be canceled, brides say

• Women who have spoken about their marriages in viral TikToks say they have been labeled “bridesillas”.
• All three shared videos discussing personal wedding preferences and received negative responses.
• One told Insider the term should be scrapped while another said it was rooted in sexism.

Three women who have gone viral on TikTok for discussing their marriages say they have received comments calling them ‘brideszillas’ when discussing their preferences.

And everyone says it’s time to put an end to this term.

The word “bridezilla” dates back to 1995, according to Grammarist. He mixes two words, “bride” and “Godzilla”, to create a word to describe a bride or bride-to-be who is picky or disrespectful in planning her wedding.

Wedding experts who discussed the concept of bridezillas with Insider’s Samantha Grindell said common examples include going over budget with the wedding or instructing wedding party members to

losing weight

.

But increasingly, the term is being used to describe women who simply have preferences for their marriages, said Jully Patel. The newlywed previously told Insider about a TikTok where she talked about the rules her bridesmaids followed, which included no lipstick or necklaces.

She said that while most of the comments on her video, which has since been viewed more than 5.5 million times, were positive, the negative 10% came from people calling her out simply for putting rules in place for her. wedding.

Being stressed about such a big event is ‘only natural’, says Patel

“If the bride is downright mean and rude to a bridesmaid, family members, guests, that’s not acceptable,” said Patel, who married her husband Shahil in August.

But it’s a different story when she and other women are labeled bridezillas for having certain preferences, she added.

Patel said weddings are “excited” for your lifetime, so it makes sense that brides would want to have some rules in place to help manage that.

“It’s the bride who kind of does everything, making sure everything goes according to plan,” she said. “It’s so stressful that naturally you’re going to get upset.”

“With the whole bridezilla thing, that word just needs to be quashed,” Patel added.

People ‘love to savor the negativity,’ another bride says

Samantha Twist, a TikToker who married husband Cameron in October 2020, said she’s also been called a bridezilla online and by her guests. Twist, who has since made her account private, told Insider there’s a good reason brides get stressed out on their wedding day.

“You grow up, you watch ‘The Wedding Planner,’ you watch all these movies,” Twist said. “Everyone says it’s such an important day.”

Twist said “everyone went crazy” when she and her husband wanted to have a color-coordinated dress code. She said about 10 of their 50 guests had an issue with it, and almost all the negativity was directed at her, not her husband.

“It was actually crazy because he was so involved,” Twist said. “At least our immediate families knew he was so involved.”

When the TikTok she posted about the experience was picked up by the New York Post, The Independent, The Sun and The Mirror, it was clear that this story of a woman painted as a bride was popular. But why?

Twist said it boils down to people who like to criticize others. “Some people were so angry,” she said. “People love to savor negativity.”

‘Bridezilla’ is rooted in sexism, bride-to-be claims

Paige Bruggink, a bride-to-be who shares achievable TikToks marriage advice before marrying her partner on New Year’s Eve, said the term bridezilla isn’t just bad, it’s sexist.

“It’s used to defame women trying to plan an event,” Bruggink said, adding that it was called bridezilla after posting a previous video when she mentioned she was going to have a wedding dress code.

She said brides “try to please hundreds of people, and they try to make sure everybody’s happy and to be a good host on a day that’s supposed, in theory, to be about… them and the person they love.”

“But they want to make sure everyone is happy and then they get stressed about it, and then people want to vilify them,” she added.

“It’s just ultimately based on sexism,” she said. “So I think it should be canceled.”